The Biggest Animal in PNG

There are no lions or tigers or bears in Papua New Guinea.
What there is is (arguably) much, much worse.
Cassowaries.

A cassowary is, to be frank, a man killing bird.
Picture an ostrich. Shrink it just a little. Only 6 1/2 feet tall. Just 125 lbs.
It's head is electric blue, to warn you.
And picture the feet of a raptor. 5 inch dagger toes.
And they're crazy territorial.
They will chase you at 30 mph.

This is why missionaries have guard dogs.
A diversion while we run away.

Why I don't like Missions Classes

It's been a while since I've posted anything here because it's been a while since I've been able to follow a thought coherently enough to write a blog post about it. (< That sentence was a lot harder to type than it should have been) I think, if I actually finish this post, I'll be so proud of me, I'll get Jacob to bring me home Oreos. I love Oreos.

Mostly I've been on an endless loop of nonsensical mnemonics and their (word that means goes with) key words, scholars, and years of publications. 8 weeks til comprehensive exams.

But when everything gets to be too much, I brew a cup of tea and curl up with my Kindle.
Wrapping myself in a warm blanket, and inhaling deeply the aroma of vanilla (vanilla sleepytime tea smells of my childhood), I turn on my Kindle... to see... my Johnson University homework reading.
Yeah! Being enrolled in just one college is for underachievers! (< not at all a serious utterance.)
So sometimes I take a break from homework to do homework.
That's my life right now.
And let me tell you.
I hate missions homework.

Why?

Because every time I start studying for missions I think,
"Yes! I'm going to do that!
Yes! This is good knowledge!
Apply ALL the things!
I have to go to PNG!
RIGHT NOW!"
And then Jacob asks me why I'm packing the house.
Apparently we have 9 more months in Dallas or whatever.

And then I look up. And realize.
I'm not going to PNG right now.
No.
I'm going to sit in front of my computer and force myself to study
all day
everyday
When I wake up.
When I'm in class.
When I get out of class.
When I'm driving. (I have Jacob drill me on flashcards)
When I'd rather be sleeping.
And that's a rather depressing thought.
So I try to avoid doing my missions class.
Because it just reminds me that there's something significantly more awesome in store for me than my present circumstance.
And it's still a long ways off.
...
......
In brighter news, Jacob is coming home with oreos!

(Sometimes it has to be the little things)

The San Antonio Banquet

Tuesday, September 17th, was Pioneer Bible Translators San Antonio Banquet. 

Jacob and I were invited to come and help represent PBT. Mostly because of how pretty and articulate I am....

We drove down on Monday and got to stay with the couple who were a particularly generous benefactor for our trip to Papua New Guinea last year. Moreover, they are a delightful couple who make splendid hosts and are good for hours and hours of storying about their adventures across the world. 

The banquet was a smashing success. 

Greg Pruett, president of Pioneer Bible Translators, spoke on transformed lives, a topic for which PBT has a multitude of stories. Quite a few times, I had to think about monkey brains (a nifty tool I use to distract myself from the subject matter enough to regain my composure) lest my eyeliner run. The breathtaking stories, the legacy of PBT, the accounts that I can only pray my ministry will contribute too, threatened to bring more than a tear to my eye. 

It's so good to be reminded of what Jacob and I are a part of. Oftentimes we can get bogged down in school work and to-do lists and forget the amazing adventure that this is merely a step of. 

I am so pleased to be a part of this organization. So pleased that I can sacrifice three days to work bring funds, not to my own ministry, but the greater ministry of Pioneer Bible Translators.  

As my beautiful hostess said, "My favorite organization to give to is Pioneer Bible Translators. Because I know that when I give to them, I'm giving to something that will extend through generations." Few things are more important than Bible Translation, she said, than giving the Word of God to people in their heart language. 

And I have to agree. 

I am ecstatic to be a part of this legacy. 

3 Abusrdly Simple Tips for Extending the Life of Your Missionary

So recently Danielle, who was my maid of honor, moved to Dallas with her husband. We hang out casually pretty frequently but we also workout together 3 days a week. And it's been great. Crazy. Having a friend. Like crazy.

I used to have a ton of friends! But then, I was living in a dorm and everyone lived right down the hall. Not everyone was free all the time but someone was usually up for some conversation whenever I was in the mood. And given that they were right down the hall, I didn't have to call and face rejection should they be busy. (After too many rejections, you stop trying...)

And then I left college. I left my home and my family and my friends. And I moved to Texas. Which wasn't a move I was really excited about. Excited about moving to the next step of the journey that'll take me to Papua New Guinea! But ... I'm pretty sure that the only reason Texans are so proud of Texas is that they need something to cling to, justifying why they live here. It's a delusion.

The missionary community has been great. Sympathetic of those who have left their family and loved ones and welcome them in. I've had friends come. But they also go. In some regards, it's easier to maintain these friendships as no one is leaving anyone. We're all at this huge train station waiting for our turn to leave.

But when I go home. When I try to reconnect with old friends...
It's hard.
I left them.
I left. and they went on living their lives. And then I try to butt back in again like nothing ever happened.
"Um... excuse me, Elizabeth, right? Listen, yeah it's been a long time but, you know, I've got things, going on, I've got to get back."
And then it sinks in.
This isn't my home anymore.
And then I leave to PNG and it's worse. Out of sight. Out of mind.
No one remembers you. a whisper in my ear. You're all alone.

And that's why missionaries are crazy.


So. If there's a missionary somewhere out there in the world, in the states or out, that you know and love, drop them a line.
1. Like their Facebook Photos
2. Comment on their facebook status
3. Send them an email
These and other gestures of reaching out let them know that while your life may be busy (and we totally get that! Our lives are chaos too!) that you still love them and that they aren't alone.

Happy missionaries stay on the field longer, doing more Kingdom work.
Extend the life of your missionary with a Thinking of You note!

(25) Things I Learned in the Jungle (About Food)

So the thing about married life is that there's two perspectives on an abundance of topics. Sometimes we're completely together on an idea and sometimes our views are quite opposing. It just makes life fun.
I gave Jacob the idea for this blog post and as he started writing, I got super jealous. So I wrote my own. We collaborated only on topics, not on wording. And then we shared our lists with each other and were delighted. Now we share them with you! (My list is reordered for beautiful parallelism!)
Check out Jacob's List Here!!

(25) Things I Learned in the Jungle (About Food)

1. Green coconuts, like Gatorade, are more satisfying on days heat stroke might kill you.
2. Life can be hard when you don't know how to cook with local ingredients. One thing you can always rely on: Curry.
3. I'm afraid of wild mushrooms, even if the nationals are eating them. 
4. Pizza isn't so much Italian cuisine as it is flat bread with random ingredients baked on top. Shrimp, potatoes, whatever's laying about. 
5. Aussie's don't like pumpkin spice lattes, and this is heartbreaking. 
6. Cheese in PNG is very expensive. And totally worth it. My comfort food
7. I'm not very good at baking bread...
8. or granola....
9. In PNG, sweet means good. So when you're looking for English potatoes as opposed to sweet potatoes, don't ask vendors if their food is sweet and then walk away disappointed when they say yes.
10. There's something more delicious about fish you've caught yourself. Until a bone gets stuck in your throat. 
11. There are better cooking techniques than boiling. Trust me. 
12. Passionfruit looks like monkey brains. 
13. Spices. They make a world of difference. 
14. The weevils in the flour are just an added source of protein. 
15. Homemade Australian Ginger Beer is way better than ginger ale could ever hope to be. 
16. Saksak is disgusting. 
17. Missionaries pay children for chores in salt. Like 2 cups. Apparently it's eaten like candy and will be gone in a few hours.
18. Orange Mango Schweppes is the best.  
19. If an Aussie asks you what kind of spider you like, you say Orange Mango Schweppes and Vanilla!
20. Apparently, you can't just toss food in a freezer to freeze it. Something about blanching....
21. Pigs are too valuable to kill. (And cute!)
22. Some food just tastes better far far away from civilization. Like custard. Dang, that custard was good.
23. Blue Mountain Coffee is awesome. Goroka coffee is not. Ask your barista before you order PNG coffee.
24. The nationals will bring potatoes and greens in abundance to sell to you. But good luck trying to get fruit. Some things are too good to share. 
25. If you're hungry enough, you can eat just about anything. 

Why I Pray For Stuff

More Thoughts from My Homework:

Unfortunately, our beliefs swing like a pendulum.
We take things to one extreme, until we realize that something's not right.
And then we go to the other extreme, until we realize that something is still not right.
And we seem to forget what wasn't right about the first way and swing back again.

For example,
To St Francis of Assisi is attributed the quote, "I preach the gospel at all times and when necessary use words."
But then we see a problem. People using this statement as a crutch not to proclaim the Gospel. "I don't have to have an awkward conversation and make myself vulnerable, because I can just live like a good person and that's enough."
So we swing.
I recently saw a post that bashed this idea with an aggressive and solid blow and a wild swing to the far side. Unfortunately, I can't recall it verbatim. But the problem that will come from the swing approach is the problem of Christians who talk the talk but don't walk the walk. People who use the rebellion against that quote as license to live as they want.
But we need to fall in the middle.
It's a both thing.
Live like Christians and tell people about Jesus.

Ok. Here's my point:
You know how people are all, "you shouldn't ask God for stuff, you should just ask the His will be done"?
"God isn't your Santa Claus"
"Prayer's are powerful. You shouldn't be asking for dumb stuff. You should pray that all the orphans are adopted! Our God is big and can do stuff. You need to pray big!"
While there is truth in these statements,
I HATE THAT!
It makes me feel like a horrible person!
Because then I'm all, "But my car is broken and I really need it to be fixed..."
"My husband is sick and I want him to be better."
"I really need the motivation to get all this work done."
And then these statements make me feel BAD for asking silly stupid things for myself!
But I don't feel like this is biblical.
Jesus says: "ask and you will receive". Later in the same passage it says "Your Father in heaven will give good gifts to those who ask Him."
Later right before Jesus dies, he says (paraphrase), Hey I really don't want to die on the cross. Like, I really don't. Please give me some other way. But your will be done.
And Jesus, per usual, gives us a great model.
Ask for what you want.
But God isn't your genie.
He's going to do what He wills.
So keep that in mind.
If God didn't grant you your request, it doesn't mean He doesn't answer prayers.
He has good gifts coming.
Like Salvation for the Entire World.

Ask for the little things. Ask for everything. Pray continuously.
Don't take this to an extreme! That was the point of my preamble!
Prayer involves praising and thanking and confessing too!
But God the Father wants to hear about your day. And wants to seek Him when you have want for anything.
He's just awesome like that.


God is not your Santa Claus.
Ask for big things because God can totally answer big prayers.
But ask for little things too.
Because God loves being sought.


This was actually something a book said that I disagreed with, so there's no point in naming the book here. 

Dream Journal: Superheros And Baby Alligators

I was trapped in a room. A prisoner. But the room wasn't too shabby. I don't know if I was a superhero or some kind of deity but I had powers. But the room had a force field around it to keep me in. Someone from the outside, be it another superhero, deity, or titan, (my dreams aren't very good at fleshing out the back story and such...) smashed the room and the walls separated from the ceiling and the force field broke. So I pushed one wall and it fell off of the cliff into the sea. And I was like, I wonder if they heard that. So then I went up to the ceiling and pushed it back onto the rest of the house. And I was all, they definitely heard that. So then I jumped out into the sea, flying out almost parallel with the water until I slipped under the surface. And then I SHOT UP! OUT OF THE WATER! And there was a pillar of water splashing up with me and I was spinning and it was AWESOME! And then I went back into the water and continued escaping. But suddenly I couldn't fly anymore. Why? Because... it's a dream, ok! And then I was walking in the grass at night, which I never recommend in Dallas because you can't see the tarantulas, but I wasn't in Texas, I was in Louisiana, and it wasn't tarantulas that bit me it was little alligators, a cubit long. And they'd nibble at my feet like my cat. And I was like, NO! NO! NO NIBBLING ON ME! So I'd pull them off and then I got on the lip of this fountain to get away BUT THERE WAS ANOTHER ONE IN THE FOUNTAIN! So I tried to wave down a passing policeman to help me but he didn't see me. And then the alligator started crawling out of the fountain to get to me!! (I had forgotten that they do that!!!) and I started to run away. A bike gang also passed me without helping. And I jumped down on the sidewalk and there were alligators everywhere and then there was a poisonous snake in the middle of the sidewalk and I was like OH NO IMMA DIE! But then the snake bit the alligator and they started thrashing like crazy and I jumped into the grass again so they wouldn't accidentally hit me and I would get bitten by the snake and ANOTHER ALLIGATOR BIT ME! So I jumped back on the sidewalk after the snake/gator scuffle and pulled the gator off my foot and threw him and then my alarm clock went off and I woke up.

THE END!